Fifty Shades of Snarry
by TheOnlyTrueMagic
Summary: Light or dark, good or evil, they were meant to be together. The possibilities of Snarry in fifty stories. *Some chapters have trigger warnings. Please read AN for each chapter!*
1. Playing in the Rain

**Disclaimer****: I don't own it, and I am making no money off of it. Please don't sue me.**

**AN 1****: This is my first entry in a collection of Snarry slash stories. Each chapter will be an independent story and of varying lengths. All will be AU, and all will involve an adult Harry. Some may be dark. Read the AN for details about the AU and warnings. **

**AN 2****: This story is EWE, a little more than two years after the Final Battle, and Harry and Severus are married. The rating is for language and implied but not explicit lemons. The prompt was "rain."**

**Summary****: Severus doesn't mind it when Harry acts childish. **

"Harry, don't you think it's time that you came in?" Severus squinted through the rain, dry and comfortable and wrapped in a shield charm. Harry Potter-Snape, his husband of one year, flew casual loops through the rain on his broom, soaring back and forth across the back garden of Potter Manor.

Harry just laughed and brought his broom down to the soggy ground, dismounting easily as he came closer to Severus.

"Actually, I think it's time that you dragged yourself out of your lab long enough to join me," Harry said. He'd let his unruly black hair grow out in the two years since the Final Battle, and the black locks were now as long as his husband's own. He shoved his wet hair out of his eyes with a careless gesture that made Severus's heart skip a beat and a particular part of his anatomy react.

The elder wizard's retort dripped with forced sarcasm. "I'll have you know that I am perfectly satisfied tending my potions in our warm, dry manor. Unlike you, I have no desire to relive my childhood by playing in the rain like an idiot."

Harry smirked at him. "Oh, come off it, Sev. We both know you're not that prissy. Wouldn't you rather be thinking of me than of your potions…me, soaking wet on my broom wearing a tight shirt and even tighter jeans…and all yours?"

Severus fought to keep his face immobile. "Such activities are best kept for the bedroom," he said stiffly, well aware that he was lying through his teeth.

Harry just laughed. "That's rich coming from you, considering that only this morning you threw me onto the table in your lab and had me right there surrounded by bubbling potions. And then last night we never even managed a proper dinner because we were too busy breaking in that new fur rug in front of the fire. Do remind me to thank Lucius for it, by the way. Of course, that doesn't even count what we did when the Minister was delayed and we were left by ourselves in his office for an hour. I'm never going to look at his desk the same way again."

Severus sighed, a smile playing around the corners of his dour mouth. "Touché, Harry. You have a point."

His husband held out a hand. "So ditch the damn shield charm and join me! Live a little, Sev!"

And when Severus still did not move, Harry wandlessly cancelled his husband's shield charm and caught the man in his arms. Severus gasped as the icy water poured down his face, soaking the thin linen shirt and black trousers that he wore just before Harry swallowed his gasp with a kiss that stole his remaining breath. He couldn't stop his hands from possessively caressing Harry, and he didn't try, surrendering to his need as the rain continued to soak them.

Harry could make him do the most outlandish things, and he decided that he would be more than happy to add "in the rain" to the growing list of places where they'd made love. He grabbed for the hem of Harry's shirt to pull it over his head but suddenly found himself holding only air as Harry pulled away.

"Damn you, Harry! Come back here!" Severus knew the mischievous look in those beloved green eyes and groaned inwardly. His husband could be as slippery as a snake when he wanted to tease Severus.

"You'll have to catch me first," Harry shouted back, taking off at a run across the muddy field.

Severus felt a familiar flutter in his heart as he took off after the younger man. Severus joked about Harry keeping him young by making him act young, but only after a few drinks or bouts of lovemaking would Severus actually admit how much he loved his husband's childishness. When it counted, as a professor of Defense against the Dark Arts, Harry was a picture of professionalism. But when the teaching robes came off, Harry was sly, conniving, and sexy as hell…even if he occasionally acted like a two-year-old.

Severus wasn't about to admit that he didn't object when Harry dragged him along for the ride.

Harry stayed a few steps ahead of him as he led him on a playful chase across the field, splashing through puddles and sliding on the muddy ground as the rain continued to fall. But Severus's longer legs finally allowed him to catch up to Harry. With a leap and a shout, Severus caught his husband in a tackle which landed them both in the middle of a mud puddle with Severus sprawled on top of Harry.

Realizing that he was probably heavy, Severus tried to shift his position, but his husband stopped him.

"It's alright, Sev. I like it." Harry reached up, wrapping himself around the elder man to pull him down. Severus felt immediately just how much Harry liked it, and his body responded in kind.

"You're an idiot you know," Severus chuckled lowly, tasting rain and earth as he kissed his husband.

"Yeah, I am. But I'm your idiot," Harry said as his fingers found the fly of Severus's trousers.

"Yes…all mine," he hissed against his husband's neck.

"Prove it," Harry demanded.

And there in the muddy field in the driving rain, Severus did just that.


	2. The Minister's Desk

**Disclaimer****: I don't own it, and I am making no money off of it. Please don't sue me.**

**AN****: This story is EWE, a little more than two years after the Final Battle, and Harry and Severus are married. The rating is for language and implied but not explicit lemons. **

**Summary****: When Severus and Harry are left alone in the Minister's office, they discuss having children…and discover a new use for the Minister's desk. **

"I'm so sorry, Harry and Severus. The Minister has been unavoidably delayed." Percy Weasley bustled into the office to place refreshments on a side table. "We can reschedule if you'd prefer. He should be here in roughly an hour."

Severus exchanged a questioning glance with Harry who shrugged. It wasn't as if they had anything pressing to do, and they really did need to iron out their proposal with the Minister regarding the mass distribution of Wolfsbane to all werewolves, regardless of their ability to pay for it. Lucius had already agreed to cover the cost, but the logistics still needed to be established.

"That's quite alright, Mr. Weasley. We'll stay," Severus said. "I do hope, however, that nothing unfortunate has befallen the Minister or his wife."

The proper young man, not quite so stiff after his experiences during the war, actually smiled at them.

"No, it's nothing like that. Hermione has an appointment today to check on the baby. They're going to see the baby for the first time and find out the gender." Percy was clearly pleased and even Severus had to smile a little at the man's obvious delight.

"Well, I will be in the outer office if you have need of me. My wife, Audrey, is on loan from the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes so I will be occupied helping her sort paperwork." With a nod to them, Percy slipped out, closing the office door behind him.

Harry glanced lazily at his husband than at the food. "Are you hungry?"

Severus shook his head. "Not so soon after breakfast." He raised his eyebrows. "I can hardly believe that my former student is now married to the Minister and expecting a child."

"Well, Draco is married and already has an infant, and he was your student," Harry pointed out.

Severus shook his head. "That's different. Draco is my godson." He sighed. "Time passes so quickly these days."

"Severus, do you want a baby?" Harry asked abruptly.

The elder wizard's head whipped around. "What did you say?"

Harry tried to pretend nonchalance but didn't quite manage it. "Do you want a baby?" he repeated.

For a moment, Severus looked dumbfounded. Oddly enough, it was one thing that the two of them, even as a married couple, had yet to talk about.

"I don't know," Severus finally admitted. "I never really thought about it."

"Never?" Harry asked.

Severus shook his head. "I've spent so much of my life caught between two masters. I never really expected to have the chance to have children." He smiled wanly at Harry. "You and I together like this…sometimes I worry that I'll wake up one morning and find out that this was all just a glorious dream."

Harry was out of his chair and on his knees before Severus had a chance to say anything more. He grabbed his husband's left hand in his own so that their wedding rings gleamed in the light.

"Do you see these, Severus? Do you see these rings? This is no dream, Severus Potter-Snape. This is as real as life gets." His voice was shaking as the elder man's hands tightened on his.

"Then show me," Severus whispered. Those dark eyes were full of the fear that lingered in the former Death Eater even in that moment, fear that Harry understood because it was the way he felt every time he spoke Parseltongue. The healers had assured him that it was simply a recessive gene in his bloodline, and that it had nothing to do with Lord Voldemort.

But Harry was still afraid.

Without a word, he stood, pulling Severus up with him. Wandlessly, silently, he cleared the Minister's desk. He pulled Severus around in front of it and shoved him onto his back, positioning him right at the edge. His husband looked up at him, stunned. Harry rarely acted this way, and Severus wasn't used to submitting. But fear was driving them both, and it was Severus's silent spell that disrobed them, signaling his assent in the only way he could.

It was quick and rough, both of them all too aware that Percy and his wife were just beyond the door, and the Minister and his wife could return at any moment. And if they got caught…the thought of that drove them on. Harry cast the bare minimum of spells before claiming his husband right there on the Minister's desk, Severus's nails digging into his skin hard enough to leave bruises even as Severus's head impacted with the wood.

The pain was sweet.

They came down in a rush, both hardly believing what they had done. Then they heard voices outside the door. The Minister had returned.

A flurry of spells, wandless and silent, redressed them in a moment and set the room to rights. And if the Minister's desk was not restored perfectly to its previous state, it didn't much matter. The Minister was too excited showing the pictures of his unborn daughter to everyone to notice anything out of place. The usually observant Minister was so distracted that he didn't even notice how carefully Severus was sitting or the flushed state of Harry's face.

The meeting went well, and Harry and Severus left the Minister's office satisfied in more ways than one. Kingsley and Hermione had asked Harry and Severus to be godparents to their daughter along with Percy and Audrey, and they had all agreed. Harry and Severus stopped to speak to Percy and Audrey before they left the Ministry.

"Are you two considering having children soon?" Percy asked.

This time, Severus had an answer ready. "We are considering it. What about the two of you?"

Audrey nodded. "Yes, we are." She turned to smirk at her husband. "We'll need to work hard to make a baby though. Are you up to the challenge, Percy?"

Percy laughed even as he blushed at the implication. "I most definitely am." He glanced over at Harry and Severus. "As for the two of you, it is abundantly clear that you have already begun trying."

The two men gasped, realizing just what Percy meant.

It was Percy's turn to smirk as Audrey laughed. "You might want to remember the silencing spells next time."

Neither Harry nor Severus could find anything to say.


	3. Broken Things

**Disclaimer****: I don't own it, and I am making no money off of it. Please don't sue me.**

**AN****: This story is EWE, a few years after the war, and Harry and Severus are married. ****This story comes with a trigger warning for suicide themes/threats.**** The rating is for dark themes, language, and implied but not explicit lemons. **

**Summary****: The war ended years ago, but Harry and Severus are still fighting it…and this is one battle which they may not win.**

There were a lot of good things about being married, Harry decided. However, marriage had not eliminated his nightmares. He still had them, but then, so did Severus. The good thing about being married was that, usually, there was someone to comfort him when he woke screaming in the dark.

But tonight, Severus had been finishing up a volatile potion, and Harry had found himself tossing restlessly in their bed. When he finally drifted off, he lost himself in a dream he'd dreamt often since the Final Battle. He saw every person their side had lost, and everyone shouted at him accusingly, blaming him for their deaths.

He woke up screaming, and he was grateful for the silencing charms that had been automatic to him since his days as a student. Thankfully, no house elves came running, but the strong arms that he wanted around him were not there. Severus's side of the bed was still empty. He checked the clock. It was after midnight.

Sighing heavily, aware that he was not going to get any more sleep, he wrapped himself in a robe that his husband had bought for him, put on his slippers, and left the suite. Neither he nor Severus had patrol duty tonight, and with it this late, he didn't expect to come across anyone.

As Harry had expected, the Astronomy Tower was empty. This was his preferred place to come when he needed to think. It was where it had all started, at least the worst of it. It was where his husband had killed Albus Dumbledore at Albus's own request, damning himself to even greater guilt for the rest of his life even as he spared Albus further suffering and spared what was left of Draco's innocence. It was the first step to Severus's ascension to the headmastership and the beginning of a year that would be hell for Harry, Ron, and Hermione, for the students and staff left behind, and for wizarding England under the tyranny of Voldemort. The Astronomy Tower was like a pensieve, and Harry went there when he needed to deal with the memories…and the guilt…one more time.

"Couldn't sleep, Harry?" asked a familiar voice. Severus came up behind him, slipping an arm around his waist as he pulled his husband against his chest. Harry relaxed against him, saying nothing and knowing that he didn't need to. His husband could read him like a book, and Harry only came to the Astronomy Tower when the memories became too much to bear. It had been happening more frequently of late.

They stood together, not speaking, watching the stars. That was one thing Harry appreciated. Severus knew when to be quiet. He loved Hermione and Ron like siblings, but both of them had the habit of being entirely too talkative. After the dark chaos of the past few years, Harry found that he was grateful for silence.

For his part, Severus was relieved to have a companion who did not expect him to make constant conversation. Severus was quiet and reserved by nature. That reserve had been a necessity when he was a spy. Now, he could choose silence and so could Harry.

Finally, though, Severus did speak. "Another nightmare?" Harry nodded. "I could give you Dreamless Sleep."

The younger man sighed. "You and I both know that it will only help temporarily. I've taken too much of that stuff already, and I'm hovering dangerously close to dependence."

Severus nodded grimly. "I know. Tonight I was trying to find a potion that would work without the risk of dependence." He shook his head to Harry's unvoiced question. "It was a waste. I was unsuccessful." He rested his chin on his husband's shoulder, stroking gently at his waist and lower, but it was more reassurance than any attempt to arouse.

Harry was exhausted, and Severus was exhausted. They were both teaching full classes, and Harry was Severus's assistant with his experimental potions. The war was officially over, but they relived it every night, and every death leading up to it. If it wasn't Harry waking up screaming, it was Severus.

"We can't go on like this," Harry said, swallowing around a lump in his throat. "One or the other of us is going to snap, possibly both of us. Our magic is exceptionally strong, and I shudder to think of what might happen…who we might hurt…if we lose control." He reached for Severus's hand and slipped it between his legs, urging his husband to start the only thing that he knew would give either of them temporary peace without the aid of a potion. Severus obliged him, trying to moderate his own worries. It wasn't working.

"Minerva suggested a mind healer," Severus said quietly as he stroked his husband.

Harry trapped his hand there and reached behind him for Severus. The elder man hissed.

"You know how I feel about mind healers, and I know you feel the same way. I won't have it, Severus! The ones they stuck us with right after the war…" Harry refused to finish the statement, concentrating instead on the pleasure they were bringing each other.

"They mind raped us." Severus quickened his pace, and Harry did the same, trying to drive the memories from their mind with physical pleasure. It never lasted, but it was something at least. When they came, it sliced like a potions knife and cut like a hex, and they understood it because it was not sweetness and light.

As they recovered themselves, Harry stared up at the stars. Severus, sitting down on the stone wall and pulling Harry down into his arms, looked up too.

"Sometimes, I want…" the younger man whispered. A shiver shook him, and his husband cast a warming charm over both of them.

"What do you want, Harry?" Severus asked. He already knew the answer. They'd had this conversation in various forms several times. Each time they spoke about it, it lost a little more of its edge.

"Sometimes, I want to jump…to find my way back to them." Harry made a sound that was like a strangled sob, but he did not cry. He had never cried. Neither had Severus.

Severus could think of a million things he should say to that, but he said none of them. He'd spent so much of his life lying for one reason or another. But with Harry, he always told the truth, and to offer any of those empty platitudes would be a lie.

So he said the only thing that was true. "Me, too."

"I'd do it, you know…if you were with me." Again, he made that strangled sound. "I wouldn't be afraid."

Severus kissed him, tasting bitterness and grief and scars that no one else could see.

"I know," Severus said. They were quiet for a time.

"If I do, I will take you with me," Harry whispered, his trembling hands holding his husband's tightly.

"And if it's me…" Severus did not finish the sentence.

Now it was Harry's turn to say, "I know."

"Always." Severus choked on the word, saw green eyes, and buried his face in Harry's hair.

They watched the stars and clung to each other, broken things both.


	4. Scars

**Disclaimer****: I don't own it, and I am making no money off of it. Please don't sue me.**

**AN****: This story is AU and EWE after the war. Harry and Severus are married. *A trigger warning is in effect for memories of child abuse and general dark themes.* The prompt for this story was "Harry and Severus sit on the deck drinking lemonade on a hot summer day."**

**Summary****: Harry and Severus know that some scars don't leave physical marks, and some fears last forever.**

"Hey, Severus. Are you finally ready to take a break?" Harry set down his quill as he watched his husband walk out onto the deck of their house. He smiled when he saw that Severus was carrying two glasses in his hands.

"I think I am. I never realized that writing a potions textbook would be quite so complicated. I suspect that I need to get away from it as much as you need to get away from writing your memoirs." He gave Harry the small smile that he reserved only for his husband. "I asked the house elves to make us some lemonade. The view of the beach out here is lovely, but it is still quite hot."

Harry sipped the cold lemonade gratefully as he glanced back at the parchment stacked on the table in front of him.

"I agree on all points. I still can't believe I allowed Hermione to goad me into writing a book about myself! Half the wizarding world believes I'm a narcissist, albeit one who killed the Dark Lord. This isn't going to improve matters any." He sighed, relaxing in the drowsy heat of the early afternoon. "Really, I understand why Hermione wants me to write it. And she's right. Our world needs to realize that the truth is nothing like Rita Skeeter makes it out to be, especially when it comes to my life." Harry grimaced as he stared at the parchment. "But that doesn't make it any easier for me."

Sipping his own lemonade, Severus chuckled. "We are both dreadfully put upon by the women in our lives. Do I need to remind you that it was Minerva who goaded me into writing this potions textbook? Apparently, she took one look at what Horace Slughorn intends to use as his textbook in class this year and nearly hit Horace over the head with it. Then she showed up on our doorstep."

Now it was Harry's turn to laugh. Finishing his lemonade, Harry stretched languidly and stood up, shoving his sweat-damp black hair out of his face. He'd let it grow out since the end of the war, and the extra length was finally beginning to coax the unruly mess to lie down. Severus watched in possessive silence as Harry pulled his shirt over his head, throwing it carelessly onto the table.

"I'm going for a swim. Do you want to join me?" Harry grinned with that distinctive mixture of innocence and temptation that was uniquely Harry.

Severus bit back a grin of his own. "No, thank you. I'll just stay here and enjoy the view."

Harry smirked at him. "Which view are you enjoying? The lovely beach…or my bare chest?"

Severus smirked back. "You wouldn't ask that question if you didn't know the answer."

Harry's grin faded a bit when his husband made no move to join him.

"You really won't come along?" Harry's voice was pleading, but Severus shook his head.

"You know how I feel about the way I look, Harry. It's been hard enough to let you see me when we are in private. But there are other people on the beach right now. They could see my…I'm not a handsome man, Harry. I never will be." Severus leaned back in his chair so that he was in the shadows.

Harry frowned. "You're handsome to me. If those other people have a problem with it, they can take it up with me."

Severus smiled in spite of himself. His husband was still such a Gryffindor.

"Nonetheless, there is no reason to provoke them. This is a wizarding community, and I have had more than my fill of being hated to last a lifetime." The smile slipped from his face.

Before he could take another breath, Harry stood in front of him.

"You think your scars are bad? They're no worse than mine." And then Harry cancelled a magical glamor so complex that even Severus had not been aware of it despite the two of them having been married for nearly six months.

Severus couldn't stop his gasp. Harry's chest shoulders, arms, and back were crisscrossed with uneven, gnarled scars every bit as horrific as his own. Mute, Severus stared into resigned green eyes.

Harry smiled again, but it was bitter.

"Your father was a bastard. Well, so was my uncle. It was worse when he drank, just like yours. Your father used a leather strap. My uncle used a leather belt. And sometimes…he used other things…just like your father did." Harry said nothing more.

There was silence for a time except for the call of the gulls and the slap of the waves against the sand.

Finally, Severus whispered, "Why didn't you tell me?"

Harry looked at him, and Severus remembered all too well the undersized boy who had flinched away from him whenever he raised his voice or made a sudden movement. Now, he knew the reason why.

"I was afraid," Harry whispered back. "I was afraid that if I told you, if I showed you, you wouldn't love me anymore."

Severus made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sob and felt the salty sting of tears in his eyes. He blinked them back.

"If you believed that then you are a fool, Harry Potter-Snape," Severus said though his tone took all the censure out of it. "And I did not marry a fool."

Severus reached out, pulling Harry against his chest. His hands grazed some of his husband's scars. Harry trembled but did not cry.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Severus asked.

Harry said nothing, but his trembling increased. Severus leaned down, pressing his lips to a particularly deep scar on his husband's shoulder. Harry's legs buckled under him, and Severus eased them both down to the wood of the deck.

A sob broke the silence. "I'm scared, Severus. Why am I still so scared?"

Severus swallowed audibly and whispered, "Some scars don't go away." Harry knew that he wasn't talking about the physical marks. "Do you know what else, Harry?" Green eyes met dark as Severus whispered against his husband's skin.

"I'm still scared too."


End file.
